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Using the microphone and ‘accelerometer’ to determine an accurate score, the app claims “All you have to do is start the application, put your i Phone on the bed, in an arm band, or even in your pocket and have intercourse, it is as easy as that.

Once you are finished, press the stop button and view your results.” Romantic.

Then, if your Facebook friend changes their relationship status, the website will send you an email, so you’ll be right in there straight away. As well as swiping left you can use the app to specify whether you’re feeling Heavenly (“Let’s go for a cute Frappuccino and take selfies”) or Sinful (“Hey, I would like to have sex with you”).

A bit like Snapchat, the app timecaps your encounters, only letting you search for available and interested people near you for one hour.

Unlike Tinder, the app doesn’t force you to link to your Facebook or other social network presence, meaning internet evidence of your shameful hour of need is minimal.

The main one being that you’re probably a fucking eagle-eyed psychopath to use it in the first place.

So you’ve tracked down future lovers on the road, Facebook and on your phone, but what about 30,000 feet in the air?

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